Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Our computer is old. a dinosaur to say the least. i spend more time coaxing it to turn on and not crash than i do getting to work on it. because of this, i don't turn it off. instaed, he sits in the corner, with his blue light always glowing, not so silently waiting for me to sit down and work or play.

last night i couldn't sleep. i'm not sure what the cause of my insomnia was, but my mind was racing. i had topics for blogs coming out the wahzoo, but the idea of sitting in front of the computer and having the glow of the screen in my eyes was so not appealing. instaed, i layed in bed, hoping i'd remember the witty stories i'd recalled long enough to be able to type out. it didn't work. as i sit here staring at the screen, i'm blanking. it's almost as if i have stage fright. scared of the reactions i'll get, like i was during chior and cheerleading and children's play house productions. hence the reason i was always the frog or the donkey (yes, i was a donkey. in pinocchio. it was a important role) or flapper girl number 3. And the reason why i never went out for a solo.

i promise i really am funny and witty and clever and all the other adjectives that can also be described as bitchy too. it's just that i am also very self aware. and sometimes too judgemental of myself. but i'm working on this. and i'm working on just opening up and letting it all go. because what do i have to lose? not much. but what do i have to gain? readers! so go me! i'm gonna try and just be myself when i write! or maybe myself, but more composed!

The baby had his 9 month check up today. He took his shot like a champ, and was rewarded with a Spiderman bandaid.

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wife of 1, mother of 2, the youngest of 3. a creative soul who expresses it through photography and sewing. (and baking, painting, writing, and anything else that would fall into a "fine arts" description)